Game theory

by RICK KANE

LATE in the season last year, Daniel Bradshaw, an AFL footballer, made the decision to be with his partner at the birth of their child rather than play in a semi final for his club. That is, he chose one team over the other.

What makes this issue fascinating to contemplate is the fact that he plays football at an elite level, at a time when the corporatisation of footy has, seemingly, become its overwhelming influence. Concurrently, male/female relations, I would argue, are evolving into more complex, respectful and, probably, mature levels.

For the individuals involved, this decision has to be unbearably personal and weighty. The reflection the decision casts, the media reaction and an appraisal of what that suggests can inform us on the state of play of what we value. In a perverse way, this incident can be read as an indicator of the times.

I might be way out of whack with contemporary thinking, but I was surprised and encouraged by somebody having the guts to make such a courageous decision. The courage pales compared to childbirth, OK - just so you don't infer a misguided perspective - but nonetheless, in a male stronghold, I call it lion-hearted.

Bradshaw's coach at Brisbane, Leigh Matthews all but endorsed the player's decision, making somewhat of a Descartian observation that individuals must be true to themselves. He expressed this point-of-view on Talking Footy. It didn't seem to correlate with the stereotyped assumption regarding what Australian men value. This especially, because it came from a legendary, hard, rugged, committed footballer. And with the potential prize of a premiership on the near horizon for all that that is worth. He then speculated, again seeming to break the mould of what we might imagine to be the Aussie bloke collective worldview, that these decisions are done as a couple. As a team.

Media commentators were not all so enlightened. On Talking Footy this issue did not develop into a discourse on the meaning of football to our lives. Or even to discuss the impact of such a decision in a corporate structure. In that sense, perhaps the program might be called Superficially Talking Footy.

Commentators elsewhere were even lees considered. On Triple M several commentators, who, it must be added, have a vested interest in the current developments of the game, provided opinion that was lacking in generosity, lateral ability and insight. Skills that you might hope anyone close to the rudder possess, let alone display. While not denigrating the decision, the general consensus was that Bradshaw owed some allegiance and responsibility to his team and his team-mates. And, I might add, metaphorically, to the game.

It is here that the clash between values espoused by the sporting contest can be contrasted against the significance and wonder of birth. Using the hyperbole associated with sport (facetiously) I will appraise the decision.

Football is often described using war/battle imagery. Commentators talk of a struggle to the death, of a player killing an opponent, of a game not being over until the dying moments. Well childbirth is about life and death in ways football can only pretend to be. A relatively straightforward labour can at any moment, for inexplicable reasons, suddenly become complicated. The equivalent on the football field might be Hird doing a hamstring five minutes into the last quarter. Hird is not going to die and the worst that can happen to the team is that they lose. Ouch.

During labour the partner is the least needed person, in practical terms. He will never be the lynch pin to a successful outcome. But he is a part of the team. For males, particularly males in positions of power or influence, it can be a humbling experience. His presence is largely symbolic and mainly in a support role.

But if I ever had to give birth I reckon the least I would expect of the partner would be to witness the unbelievable pain and agony, to connect with the tumult of emotion surging through my mind and to do every stupid little thing I asked. As a male who has witnessed labour/childbirth (both caesarean and vaginal) I find it impossible to draw a comparison.

When a game of footy is compared, in serious terms, it begs the question, what is valued more, life or kicking the pigskin around?

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